Tuesday, November 17, 2015

30 Things for Which I am Thankful

30 days of November. 30 days of Thanksgiving.

1. I am thankful for two little girls who came into my life and changed it in more ways than I ever could have imagined. I am thankful for their health and well being. I am thankful for the little whispers and sweet songs. I am thankful for the new words they teach me and who I am becoming because of them.

2. I am thankful for a husband who married a crazy lady, but loves her all the same. Who has stood by my side through the loss of my religion and the discovery of something so much more fulfilling. I now only identify with a small remnant of the woman he married, but he has always been there for me; he is my best friend.

3. I am thankful for science and medical science. It has saved my life, protected my babies from infant death, and has given us peace of mind through some very scary times.

4. I am thankful for my family. Yes, those I live with, but also the folks who still talk to me even though the years, the miles, and the lies that enveloped my youth seemed to try to block a deep relationship from forming. Those who did not have to keep in touch, yet still have. I love you.

5. I am thankful for my friends. The very close ones, who I never get to talk to as much as I would like and the friendly acquaintances who I wish I could get to know so much better. I know my insecurities and awkwardness sometimes prevents me from reaching out, but I am still so glad I have all of you.

6. I am thankful for my job. And the job I had before this. And the job Dustin had before that. I am so grateful for being able to provide for our family. Even when times were tough and we depended upon food pantries and the government for help. I am so thankful to live in a country where my children may have had to go to bed hungry, but didn't have to starve while we were unemployed. 

7. I am thankful for my home. I am grateful that we own it. I am happy that even though it started as a run down house, we have made it into a warm, inviting home. Who says a 110 year old can't have charm?

8. I am thankful for my colleagues, old and new. I am thankful for Michelle and Sue. On the days I really didn't know if I could make it through the day at my last job, they were always there to help me laugh about life and help me keep my cool. I am thankful for Frank and Andrew, they always help me find answers to my questions and have helped me adapt to my new job, even though they didn't have to.

9. I am thankful for the city where we live. It is growing and improving every day and I feel so lucky and fortunate to have landed here. I am so thankful that I started here without a friend within 2000 miles and am now surrounded by awesome people.

10. I am thankful for our vehicles. They may not be the newest nor the best, but they get me to work, and the girls to school everyday. 

11. I am thankful for my daughters' teachers. I am so grateful that they teach my children reading, writing and arithmetic, along with a bunch of other things. I am thankful that I don't have to pay much for my children to get a basic education. 

12. I am thankful for progress. Progress in my life, in my dreams and goals, in our society, and science.

13. I am thankful for social media. It has allowed me to keep in touch with some very awesome friends and acquaintances that I would have lost touch with otherwise. 

14. I am thankful for quiet moments. No matter how few and far between they are.

15. I am thankful for my dog. Yeah, he isn't the brightest, and ofttimes a little rambunctious, but he calms a part of me that I had forgotten about since I lost my dear Phoebe.

16. I am thankful for the written word. I don't have as much time for it as I would like, but it's wonderful to get lost in the imagination of others.

17. I am thankful for the freedom that my grandfather and so many others fought for. I hate that we still have to fight for many freedoms here at home, but I am grateful that many freedoms have been recently won.

18. I am thankful for the internet, Wikipedia, and oddly enough, the Craigslist ATFO. I am so thankful that I have had to opportunity to learn so many things in the past five years. Many things led me away from Mormonism, and for that I am forever grateful. I am thankful that when I don't know the answers to my daughters' questions, that I am able to hop online and we can find out together.

19. I am thankful for unconditional love. Something that I had never thought I had felt, until I had my daughters.  Growing up I felt the love from my parents was contingent upon certain things being met or achieved. I am thankful that isn't my mindset in raising my daughters.

20. I am thankful for my local UU church. I don't go as often as I would like, but when I was struggling out here in a new place, feeling so alone, they helped me feel less so.

21. I am thankful for my abilities. I am thankful that I can do what I can do, even when I feel like I should be able to do more.

22. I am thankful for spaghetti, pizzelles, biscuits and gravy, coffee, chicken 'n dumplings, and every other smell and taste that reminds me of my two beautiful grandmothers.

23. I am thankful for being able to create. I am thankful that I can sew, embroider, darn, crochet, paint and bake. That even though I love them as hobbies, I know they are also post-apocalyptic life skills.

24. I am thankful role models. They are different today than they were when I was a child, but I know that I always have looked up to others and have striven to be more than I am.

25. I am thankful for charity. The charity of others that has allowed me to have things that I would otherwise not been able to afford or obtain, and the charity that I do that allows me to have those happy, warm fuzzies.

26. I am thankful for my parents and my brothers. I no longer talk to them, but I still love them.  I am thankful for the strength it took to end my relationship with them, even though it was extremely painful and the hardest thing that I have ever had to do.

27. I am thankful for pictures; the few I have of myself before the age of 17, the boxes of pictures of Dustin's grandparents and mother, the many I have of my own children and little family. I don't know why, but having them makes me happy.

28.  I am thankful for my sense of humor. It has kept me out of prison, has led me to a life of fandom and it has helped shaped two little girls into little sassy pants.

29. I am thankful for holidays. I love the traditions, events and memories that are made when a day is set apart from the rest to celebrate life, love and family.

30. I am thankful for this one life I get to live on this tiny speck of rock hurling through space. It is way too short and way too small, but it's mine and I get to share it with so many cool people and cool things. 

I am so thankful for so much more than I could possibly say, but I am so thankful today and everyday for every single person reading this. I hope everyone enjoys their days of Thanksgiving.

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